Every day, countless parents, spouses, family members or friends find themselves on the other end of a phone call, desperately seeking help for their adult loved one.
Whether it’s a young adult struggling with the pressures of college or a partner experiencing mental health issues, the challenges can feel insurmountable. As witnesses to their loved ones’ struggles, they are often left grappling with a profound sense of helplessness and frustration. The instinct to provide unwavering support clashes with the reality that their adult child, spouse, family member or friend must chart their own courses.
Balancing assistance with fostering independence and respecting autonomy becomes a delicate dance, leaving you feeling uncertain how best to help.
Here at Columbus Counseling Group (CCG) it is our policy that clients aged 18 or older contact the office to begin services, we do not allow parents, friends or family members to initiate the process to begin these services on their behalf.
By requiring adult clients to initiate contact and make appointments themselves, CCG is respecting the autonomy and privacy of the individual seeking treatment, which aligns with the principles of patient centered care, where individuals are active participants in their healthcare decisions.
It’s a painful realization that you cannot control your adult loved ones choices or outcomes. However, there are ways you can help.
01.
Express concern and support. Begin by expressing your genuine concern for their well-being and let them know you are there to support them. You might say, “I’ve noticed you haven’t seemed like yourself lately and I am worried about you. Can we talk about what you are experiencing?”
02.
Offer Help and Resources. Ask if they are currently receiving the care they need and if not, offer to help connect them with the appropriate professional support. You could say, “If you’re not already getting help, I can help you find the resources to get started, sit with you while you’re making the initial phone calls to schedule or accompany you to your appointments, so you don’t feel like you are taking this first step alone.”
03.
Consider seeking therapy or coaching yourself. Any positive change to any member of the family system will inevitably shift the dynamics of the system. Remember, that although this typically moves the family toward healthier interactions, that doesn’t always look like what you are hoping for or expecting. Significant changes take time and often involve several phases of change. The results can be amazingly life changing, but the process can be challenging.
While your loved one ultimately has to make the call to link with treatment themself, CCG can offer you resources to help you better understand your loved one, give you practical tools to support them, and equip you through coaching or counseling to be your healthiest. If your loved one is considering treatment and you don’t know where to start, you can also schedule a consultation session to better understand the wide variety of treatment options, and obtain information on a variety of quality providers and centers in Ohio and across the country.
